Fluck the flu part two or how I ended up looking like Jimmy Durante

Anosmia. I have insomnia over anosmia.

Doc Nos knows anosmia. I say mamma mia-- anosmia? A nose-- me oh my --my nose . OY!

My nose has stopped working.

I mean it. I can't smell shit!

I mean it. No exaggeration!

I peeked in the corner where the litter box takes up residence and it's needing a change as in needing a change last Wednesday. Normally I would smell that it's time for new litter. But my nose isn't working..I need to send it to an old factory for olfactory repair and service.

I need a nose. Right now all I have is this red thing that seems to have swollen to three times it's normal not-very-tiny self. I look like a photo that's been taken too close. I look like there really is a Clown's Nose Wednesday and I am a believer and wearing the largest reddest nose I can find.

Only it's a non-working nose. It needs a battery or a battery of tests. It needs to function or get smaller and less red. It can't be both this ugly and this useless.

I am eating all the time but nothing tastes good. (Actually I have acquired another flucking flu symptom - metallic taste in my mouth. Is someone poisoning me? This is also adding to the fact that nothing tastes good, and please don't tell me to have every mercury filling removed from my mouth.)

My nose can make noise. It can sneeze and snort and blow, but it cannot smell ergo I cannot smell and it's now making sense why yesterday's chicken dinner resembled Monday's mexican food which resembled Saturday's pizza which resembled Friday morning's pancakes. It's all the same...everything tastes like a cross between saw dust, cardboard and white bread.

Yet the quest to eat continues. BLT today tasted like brownie I had for dessert. Ginger ale or Dom Perignon...the same. Bland white rice and shrimp fra diavalo -- the same. Litter box filled to the top and Shalimar perfume -- the same.

Does a man alone in the forest who cannot smell need to bathe?

Will I ever smell a rat again or will I become naive and gullible? Or will I eat a rat because if you can't smell and you close your eyes you can't taste very well and if you add in a metallic taste ,a rat could very well taste like a 2 inch square of aluminum foil or a copper golf bracelet or vice versa.

So I can't smell. Swell. My nose can swell and maybe so much swell has killed the smell. Hells bells. I can hear! thank the ears-- and that will have to sustain me.

I will listen to bacon frying to see or rather hear if this will stimulate my appetite. I will snap beans in two and clink ice in my glass hoping to make up for this missing sense.

I miss my sense and losing my sense over my lack of sense.

I want to be sensible; I am a sensate being. I need to have all my senses about me and all my wits. Otherwise I am going to end up being an insensitive half-wit with a very large crimson nose and fushia flared nares offering nothing much to me except allowing a limited amount of air to find its way through these passageways completely void of aroma or odor.

Right now no nose would be good nose.