Words and Phrases Anonymous, care to join?

My name is Mary and I'm a word-abuser.

I, without the benefit of any intervention might I add, have taken it upon myself to clean up my language and stop using trite sayings and words. Step one in the process is to admit you have a problem. I am admitting my problem and below are some of the words and phrases I am giving up for all time.


Uber. It’s past its prime and past its time. You’re a goober if you use uber. I’ve loved uber and used uber up to the point where I cannot stand to see it written or said one more time. I am burying uber in the garden like a tuber. Bye bye uber.

You can’t unring a bell. No you can’t unflush a toilet either, so what?

This phrase has to go. There has to be a better way to express the obvious that somethings can't be undone. I am unusing, unsaying and unwriting this phrase from now on. I will unsing its praises and give a lip wiggle to anyone who uses this phrase in my company.

Peeps. From now on the only peeps that will pass through my lips will be those pastel sugary delights you get at Easter. I will never describe a friend, even a small chicken of a friend as a peep again. I will live my life peep-free. I swear.

Bling bling. I love onomatopoeia. I love the fact that I can spell onomatopoeia and most of you can’t. Five minutes ago I couldn’t spell it either and was looking in the dictionary under A but now I’ve got it down.

You never know when you’ll need to spell this word. Maybe you’ll be invited to a BEE in the near future. On that basis alone, the looming bee invitation, I’d memorize the spelling of this word. Otherwise you may never find it again in any dictionary.

I have a strong feeling for words that sound like what they are describing. But I am swearing off bling bling from this day forward. I am taking bling bling and smelting it down to its raw form: jewelry.

Mad Props. This one’s got to go. Props of any kind-- mad, sad, glad must be unsaid from this day forward. I once used this phrase on a young waitress with tattoos and sparkly things embedded in her face, to describe the great job she’d done in serving us our meal. I used it this one time without feeling foolish.

I felt uber cool when I said it...scratch out uber. Never again. No more props for me. I'm stopping with the props today, no matter what mood they're in.

Cool Beans. I use this phrase a lot. To me the world is filled with opportunities to interject: Cool Beans. I sound like a fool and will never say this again unless someone asks me what is the main ingredient in hummus?

My Bad. I haven't used this but some of you have. Don't say it again. It does something inside my head that isn't good. Never ever say my bad or our bad.

It is not "sick" it is not "phat" it is just bad English. Let's stop the insanity right here and right now. Raise your right hand and repeat after me: I will never use the phrase my bad again, so help me Rhonda!