My Hair Don’t
A few months ago I made the decision to stop spending money at salons to get my hair cut and just let it grow. I never really liked any of the hair cuts – so why bother?
I didn’t like the layered ones and I didn’t like the straight edged bobs. I didn’t like fake curls or high-maintenance dos that take time, mouse, gel and a blow dryer. I hate bangs and worse, I hate hair falling into my face and sticking to my lips.
I’m a no-nonsense woman who must be able to be clean and coiffed and out the door in about 10 minutes. If it takes longer than that for me to be “beautiful” than the hell with beauty.
Husband came from a home where his mother spent three hours every night making dime-sized pin-curls in her hair. That’s how her mother fixed her hair into 1940 curls and that’s how she does it – without even a nod to modern day hair styles or the obvious discomfort it must cause her to keep her arms over her head for three hours.
May I add that the end result is nothing to wish for either.
When husband and I were dating, I received numerous compliments from him about being able to get ready lickety-split, jump in a convertible without pleading to have the windows rolled up and the AC on and just generally not letting make-up or hair-dos ever keep him waiting for a date.
Even though I don't have a specific hair-do, he likes the way my hair looks.
The more artificial I look the more artificial I feel which isn’t good. (One exception, red toenails and red fingernails..gotta have ‘em.)
So this new hair do doesn’t take any time at all. Wash, comb, let air dry and then pull it back into a ponytail which is now heading down my back. (If I don’t have time to air dry my hair, then it goes back wet…still okay because eventually it dries.)
I once had a buzz cut just because I could. But spare hair isn’t any more attractive on me than poufed and crimped and twisted and textured hair that costs a fortune to acquire and makes me make a sad face into my rearview mirror as I drive home with this new costly concoction.
I’m just reporting in that I’ve received more compliments on the simplicity of my hair which has been allowed to grow --and is swept back into a ponytail so that it never interferes with my daily life, than with the hair-dos that emptied my wallet and fought with the natural flow of hair gravity, cowlicks and the general distaste hair has for being forced into something other than just hanging out and off one’s head.
Just being able to go from jammie-clad, unshowered --to clean and sparkley in ten minutes is worth it. Add in some compliments and I gotta believe I’m on to something here…
A few months ago I made the decision to stop spending money at salons to get my hair cut and just let it grow. I never really liked any of the hair cuts – so why bother?
I didn’t like the layered ones and I didn’t like the straight edged bobs. I didn’t like fake curls or high-maintenance dos that take time, mouse, gel and a blow dryer. I hate bangs and worse, I hate hair falling into my face and sticking to my lips.
I’m a no-nonsense woman who must be able to be clean and coiffed and out the door in about 10 minutes. If it takes longer than that for me to be “beautiful” than the hell with beauty.
Husband came from a home where his mother spent three hours every night making dime-sized pin-curls in her hair. That’s how her mother fixed her hair into 1940 curls and that’s how she does it – without even a nod to modern day hair styles or the obvious discomfort it must cause her to keep her arms over her head for three hours.
May I add that the end result is nothing to wish for either.
When husband and I were dating, I received numerous compliments from him about being able to get ready lickety-split, jump in a convertible without pleading to have the windows rolled up and the AC on and just generally not letting make-up or hair-dos ever keep him waiting for a date.
Even though I don't have a specific hair-do, he likes the way my hair looks.
The more artificial I look the more artificial I feel which isn’t good. (One exception, red toenails and red fingernails..gotta have ‘em.)
So this new hair do doesn’t take any time at all. Wash, comb, let air dry and then pull it back into a ponytail which is now heading down my back. (If I don’t have time to air dry my hair, then it goes back wet…still okay because eventually it dries.)
I once had a buzz cut just because I could. But spare hair isn’t any more attractive on me than poufed and crimped and twisted and textured hair that costs a fortune to acquire and makes me make a sad face into my rearview mirror as I drive home with this new costly concoction.
I’m just reporting in that I’ve received more compliments on the simplicity of my hair which has been allowed to grow --and is swept back into a ponytail so that it never interferes with my daily life, than with the hair-dos that emptied my wallet and fought with the natural flow of hair gravity, cowlicks and the general distaste hair has for being forced into something other than just hanging out and off one’s head.
Just being able to go from jammie-clad, unshowered --to clean and sparkley in ten minutes is worth it. Add in some compliments and I gotta believe I’m on to something here…
posted by mary bishop | 7:50 AM
41 Comments:
Very well put. I dont like the muss and fuss either. Its just not fun.
The pincurls...in you hubbys moms hair? That really explaines your previous post. Something is truly wrong with her head after having pincurls in all night..not to mention taking 3 hours to do it!
Glad you found something that you like MB.
My ex sis in law is a nice girl, but spends a lot of her life in front of the mirror doing girlie girl stuff. She is almost hurting if someone does not notice or comment. Her whole world is wrapped around her appearance. Life can be cruel when we get wrapped up into shallow things sometimes. She would be in trouble if she had to rely on conversation of substance to get through a dinner party.
Next step: cut out basic hygiene all together. From bed to car: 12 seconds.
You will get many compliments on your punctuality.
While I would seem to lack the requisite qualifications to comment on hair (the first, of course, being .. well, hair), I can say with some confidence that very long hair is just as easy to care for as very short hair.
What seems to take the most time is that tweener hair ... the matronly football helmet length that announces to the world that you've pretty much given up and decided that menopause is just fine, thank you.
My older daughter's hair touches the back of her knees. She can have it done and up and be ready to go ten minutes after getting out of a shower.
Sparkle, you may not know this, but we'd be happy to wait in the car for you that extra 10-15 minutes.
No rush...
I *LOVE* no nonsense hair. I spend money every 2 months to color it(cuz i don't like mine) and have the layers trimmed but that's it. Every morning it's brush, bend over shake and flip and i'm good for the day. :) YAY easy hair! :)
lawbrat - I love that you don't like the muss and fuss (well put) hair too...
I'm selling my hairdryer, hot rollers and opting for the old0-fashioned hair brush.
Yes, it is amazing...the more I think about that woman the more I know she's got some severe emotional problems..Bobby pins for crissakes, where do you even find them today?
Jeff - when one's whole world is about one's appearance - that is the ultimate losing battle because we all age like it or not.
If only people would invest in their mind and soul what they do in superficial beauty products...we'd be a better world.
Sparklestone! Welcome back from vacation...yes one could cut out hygiene and be ready to go on a moment's notice --but that kind of punctuality would be inSTINKual, n'est-ce pas?
Nilbo...that menopausal matronly helmut-head look is so uncool...
Your daughter is beautiful I'll bet and with little fuss and muss as lawbrat says so aptly.
Sylow...oh no, don't tell me Sparklestone is speaking from experience!!! You are one funny guy for a mathematician scientist!
ilanna - thanks for visiting my blog! I'm with you kiddo, easy hair for the rest of my life.
Now color is another thing...coloring hair is fun and usually the color one picks is a mere adhancement of one's own hair color...
Agreed agreed agreed. I always got grumbles from my mother who thinks that hair must be styled and hates that mine never is. But I'm happy with my long hair. I can play with it and do intricate styles when I feel like it. And when I don't - bun or ponytail and I'm off. Easy makes it worth it. Plus I can do all the stuff women with "styled" hair can't do. Their style means they've got one - maybe two - looks. Much more versatile.
E - so true -- plus if we are in the mood, we can locate a couple of tortoise shell 1940 combs and pull back our hair with vintage hair accessories which is quite romantic...
I'm going on ebay to look!
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how come all compliments directed sylow's way have to get a 'for a math dude' qualifier tacked onto it?
Sparky, I'd tell you not to change the subject, but that seems to be all we ever do on poor marybishop's blog.
In that case Sylow, let me say you have very nice hair for a math geek.
I couldn't hold a candle to those long curly locks you had in Omaha... I'm sure they were highly flamable.
You talk about itchy beard, how was your scalp with that mop glued to it?
Sparky, because Sylow P is more than a man -- he's a damned theorem!
Sylow theorems
The following theorems were first proposed and proven by Norwegian mathematician Ludwig Sylow in 1872, and published in Mathematische Annalen. Given a finite group G and a prime p which divides the order of G, we can write the order of G as (pn · s), where n > 0 and p does not divide s.
Theorem 1: There exists a Sylow p-subgroup of G, of order pn.
Theorem 2: All Sylow p-subgroups of G are conjugate to each other (and therefore isomorphic), i.e. if H and K are Sylow p-subgroups of G, then there exists an element g in G with g−1Hg = K.
Theorem 3: Let np be the number of Sylow p-subgroups of G.
np divides s.
np = 1 mod p.
In particular, the above implies that every Sylow p-subgroup is of the same order, pn; conversely, if a subgroup has order pn, then it is a Sylow p-subgroup, and so is isomorphic to every other Sylow p-subgroup. Due to the maximality condition, if H is any p-subgroup of G, then H is a subgroup of a p-subgroup of order pn. There is also an infinite analog of the Sylow theorems:
Theorem: If K is a Sylow p-subgroup of G, and np = |Cl(K)| is finite, then every Sylow p-subgroup is conjugate to K, and np = 1 mod p, where Cl(K) denotes the conjugacy class of K.
Now you can see...Sylow conjugates frequently...is good with figures, and has his own subgroup which I assume is like a fan club.
Sylow - thanks so much for saying "poor" Mary - I deserve to hear it..now send poor me on a vacation!
If, however, the talk on Sparky's blog is true about him...then an itchy beard would be a girl with fleas. <-joke
Now really: My very best friends in the world are a gay couple...I love my gay friends with all my heart and pray some day (if I prayed) that they'll have equal rights to civil marriage....
The way I see it, this could be anywhere from truly enlightening to completely pointless and stupid.
So much for remaining anonymous. If you really want the full story, that 1872 paper is available online for free right here.
I really don't deserve this much attention.
btw, Sparky definitely does not know any girls with fleas, but miss kate definitely does live with a mangey mutt.
Welcome BULLSEYE!
Now are you splitting hairs with me or are you trying to second tress me?
I'm sorry Sylow I had to out you...when a celebrity of your stature is among us - we should know...by the by - you are holding up very well for your age my dear....
If my insurance guy finds out we burried an empty coffin, he's gonna be pissed. You think he'll want interest on the death pay-out?
The whole deal with insurance is you give them money and then you give them more money and then..some more money for good measure, and when you ask them for something they tell you it isn't covered..then you give them some more money --so I'd say yes...
Those insurance people, they got you by the short hairs.
sparklestone said...
Those insurance people, they got you by the short hairs.
---
Feeling sick from laughing so hard...last time I laughed this hard it was at laurenbove's comparison photos of the runaway bride and a mourning dove...which will tell you how funny this line strikes me...
I know this is genetic, but you don't have any short hairs, Sparklestone.
OMG: These comments are too hilarious! Dudes...I don't know to whom I should give the compliments. Funny MB, Funny Sylow, Funny Sparkle...so damn funny....
Re Hair: I find the simpler the better and frankly, more elegant. I have long hair that I cut no more than twice per year. It saves tons of money and I never come home crying my eyes out over a crappy 100 dollar hair cut. Yea.
J's favorite way for me to "do" it is to wet it and gel it then slick it back into a tres chic low ponytail. He absolutely quivvers when I do that. I actually hate how much attention this particular configuration draws to my actual face, but...sigh...he likes it.
I'm with you. No one waits for me to primp. I'm the one standing by the door tapping my toe in this house.
You guys are so very funny!
I'm with you mb, no fuss.
I live by the cosmo girl way
-Ready in 10 minutes
-Always have your passport ready
-and always have birth control
sylow...does that mean Sparky has long hairs? Or is he the reason I get three or four searches for waxed testicles on my blog?
LB - well we have at least two husbands who like the pulled back low pony tail look...hurray for us - cheap and easy hair-do.
You my sweet, are pretty damn funny yourself as is
Paintergirl...hiya! Laughing wildly at your cosmo accouterments...
yup no fuss...and that goes for dinner too...
In trying to answer your question Mary, I'm reminded of a song a Canadian fraternity brother taught me about a girl named Mary Ann Barns. The relevant line reads: "...hair on her ass like the branches on a tree."
Waxing Sparklestone would be a full time job, not only for the waxer, but the pharmacist doling out pain killers.
In retrospect, I realize that a simple Hobbit reference would have answered your question without imagery passing beyond a PG rating.
Apologies for the potentially scarring description.
Sylow your eloquence is positively hirsute...yup --makes no sense but when do I get to use the word hirsute?
Can I, or can I not use it on Sparky? Does he have short hairs, no hairs or hairs like branches on a tree...?
PG rating over here means if Paintergirl gets upset...and knowing her..she's cool with it all....
Did you know you have to read about 357 pages of Ulysses before you would ever read a single word that could be interpreted as anything other than difficult to understand but nothing approaching pornography in any way...
Even on page 357 (if one ever gets there...) you learn that a girl leans back showing some freaking leg...)
As a librarian/mathematician...I thought you should know in case you don't...
(Husband is plodding through the book, for himself, for me and for all of us who refuse to pick it up ever again and attempt reading it...and this book gets banned? By whom? Who ever understood it or read it or wanted to read it...except a few professors and Joyce's mother?)
I LOVE it-PG rating. Hysterical! I should have my own rating system!!
I'll have to work on that.
And gosh darn it-I wanted to read Ulysses, but now I'm questioning it.
I am half way through Of Human Bondage, and well, the title is a little misleading. (Unless of course I could time travel and see how uptight people were back in the early 1900's.)
so much to say..
I am completly envious of all your wash and brush and goes out there. I have thick unruley curls that have to be battled with a weedwacker and soaked in pure conditioner for an hour before anything productive can happen.
That being said.. i usually just pull it back into a poney tail and and hope for the best.
I'm with LB. You guys are toooo funny. If I were drinking something, it would have most definitly flew out my nose.
Paintergirl, your last comment had me holding my sides with laughter.. I tried reading 'Of Human Bondage' too.. and had the same exact thought.. misleading!
PG - do it...make up your own rating...which would probably be much like mine: it's all good baby....
Personally I'm more Baum than Maugham...
Rita - one of the most beautiful women I ever saw has thick unruly curls...don't tame them..let them be! Gorgeous - I love curls, natural curls that defy gravity and place alluring tendrils on necks and temples.
I am glad to know you too are a card carrying member of the ponytail society!
I've thought long and hard about my rating system
1-great
2-some good/some bad
3-do not waste your time
I'm more Baum than Maugham
I love you! Did you know Baum lived in little ol' Peekskill? My husband and I want to get the city to paint a road yellow. This crazy little town was inspiration for the book.
PG - no I didn't know Baum came from Peekskill - and damn tooting - the town should have a yellow brick (could be faux) road...I had no idea Peekskill was the inspiration for the book...
If I were mayor I'd probably change the name to Oz!
thanks for the info..I love to learn...about everything..
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