Bad Fences Make Bad Neighbors
“Oh, give me land, lots of land under starry skies above
Don't fence me in
Let me ride through the wide open country that I love
Don't fence me in
Let me be by myself in the evenin' breeze
And listen to the murmur of the cottonwood trees
Send me off forever but I ask you please
Don't fence me in.”
This is a sequel to The Ruination of my Temple, my Mosque, my Cathedral post I did on Tuesday.
It’s obvious now why the border patrol has spent all week futzing about my rear property line – a fence with be erected soon, maybe today, certainly done by next week.
And it will be a stockade fence – sturdy enough to fend off the Indians, if they should try to attack, and ugly enough to boil my blood – geesh wouldn’t you think they’d mention their plans before they went ahead and tore down bushes, shrubs, vines and trees with the specific purpose of replacing this greenery with a fence that looks like it should be surrounding Fort Henry?
Border fences are tricky things. I’m not going to hire a lawyer or surveyor so I have to acquiesce to the property line my neighbor has established. (I think the fence is on MY property.)
I’m sure I’ll get used to the new fence and will do my best to grow some greenery on my side of the barrier to keep the back yard from looking like a place where a shout of: “Who goes there?” would be expected.
Right now, I think I’ll have to find a musket and a saloon to get through this transition.
posted by mary bishop | 7:21 AM
29 Comments:
I love that song so much I sing it to my son. My son will be in therapy telling the good doctor, "mom never sang nursery rhymes, but she san Cole Porter." Great.
I'll give you a great deal on a musket. It helped us with the take over of our current house.
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Do you mean the Fort Henry in Ontario or the one in Tennessee?
I mean, is this a War of 1812 sort of fence or a Civil War sort of fence?
Throw me a bone, here.
One word: clamatis. No, it is not an STD.
I'd re-think the lawyer/surveyor decision, by the way. A surveyor wouldn't be terribly expensive, and it will save a lot of heartache and legal work down the road if you ever decide to sell. You think a lawyer is expensive now, just wait till he begins drawing up easement agreements.
Im with Nilbo on that one. The cost now will be a fraction of what it could be later. If you sell, then your stuck with those costs.
Im having a fence issue myself. I would definitely get a surveyor or even just check what the local zoning rules are so youy are protected.
Oh goody..hard to get a good deal on a musket nowadays. Gee, if we strike the deal PG, we can be the two musketeers!
Sparky - I don't know my forts very well..forts aren't my forte.
Just picture cheap wood that comes to points at the top...bad side being installed towards my yard, posts being shimmed by old pieces of wood, crooked and now this latest piece is missing a slat...
you gee ell why?????????
Nilbo..you are so clever...clematis indeed sounds like a social disease...
I'm not sure I understand the legal problem...if the fence does go over the line, it would be by a few inches..so he can have those inches of land for all I care...
Oh Geeze lawbrat...the lawyer is agreeing with Nilbo...oh no...am I in trouble?
William, I called zoning this morning where they informed me he can install the fence wrong side in our direction..it is only courtesy when you are putting up a fence on the line to place wrongside your way...
This fence is an abomination...husband will flip when he sees it...
I would definitley check on your property line. You could call a title company and ask for a platt map. That might help. It should have some dimensions there to refer to.
I have a "Clematis", its purple.
Happy Friday!
HI Dashababy and Summer!
Clematis it is...when they're done putting up this half-ass fence which will put husband over the edge when he comes home tonight...oh my - hope there isn't such a thing as yard rage...but it might be invented tonight!
Oh, and thanks for the compliments yesterday. Of course I look good, do you think I would post a bad pic of myself of what I truly look like??? hehe.
or is it, ugly neighbors make bad fences??
Dashababy, ugly neighbors do make bad fences!
Ugly because they never once spoke to me, have been hanging out all day in my yard and have done an amateur job of fence erecting...I like all my erections to be pro...!!
You might offer my assistance to your neighbors then MB.
Shrubbery. Lots of shrubbery. Big tall shrubbery. And you should make your neighbors eat some too. Poisonous shrubbery. (*wonders how many times she can use shrubbery in the same post*)
My brother went through this. You need to tell them to stop, until you can both agree that the fence is on their property.
Courtesy would dictate that if it is on your side the 'nice' side should face you. Not to mention that communication thing they left out.
Hey Jeff...I sure wish I could get you up here talking to the neighbors...somehow I would bet they might do things differently.
Even if that weren't the case, it's always nice to see a professional erection!
Poor husband works so many hours tha by the time he gets home, he won't have any fight in him...or the exact opposite, he'll rip that fucker down ugly picket by picket...then the cops, jail, posting bond etc. Hope it's the former...
E-sweetie -- I adore the word shrubery..I use it often...just like I say beverage, night garment, spectacles for glasses...love using the less used word if I can..so your shrubery comment rubbed me the right way!
Sylow, you and I would do things one way, but this guy is not courteous in the least...standing on my property, he yelled at my dogs who I let out on their property on their leashes, by the way...and they barked because he was on OUR property...causing him to gesticulate, growl and yell something I couldn't hear.
One more thing, because you are all sick to death of my fence woes I'm sure I will stop talking about this tomorrow unless husband gets arrested or I do -- this is the most half-ass fence I've ever seen...he's placed one section on our loam pile..which will erode or maybe we might even want to use a shovel or two of it..leaving his fence suspended in air...
He has used at least 4 different colors of wood to brace, connect and fortify this godawfulugly fence.
They are nailed in willy nilly and this side looks like holy hell...but I will buy vines and import poison ivy if I must...this fence will be covered in vines in 2 or 3 weeks...I'm calling a friend in Alabama to send me some Kudzu...
omigod. This fence sounds horrible and deadly, I hope that no one gets hurt! I will be back to find out what your hubby thinks when he gets home. I hate this kind of bad neighbor stuff...sheesh.
I'm just honoured that a word used on my blog weeks ago has made it to another blog! Hopefully it will become commonly used, at which point I can claim that I invented it and had the first published usage, and clean up on the royalties. I'll be rich I tell you - rich~!!
With the bit of fence nailed to the tree - if it doesn't kill the tree, eventually it will rip the fence apart as the tree grows - that'll be fun to watch.
Finally - clematis is good but poisonous to dogs so be careful with it if you have a pup that likes to much plants. So far, our two have avoided it like it was poison, which it is, so that's good. Because I'm a geek, I've actually taken pictures of it - commence mocking now.
Pic 1 and
Pic 2
HI Weetzie..how are you?
Husband looked sad, but didn't kill anyone...so we went out for our ritual Friday night pizza...slightly somber but no fatalities back at the home front.
All our beloved dogs and kids were told to stay clear of the new fence --until we break the law, that is all we can do --under the law...
captain underpants! I posted comments twice, the first time I gave you your due respect or mad props for coining the term fucktard which I absolutely adore!!
That comment withered on the internet vine ...so I tried to recreate the comment again, this time leaving off the source of that beautiful seductive word.
So sorry!
Next Cap'n -- your photos are magnificent, alluring and simply beautiful...I love clematis..I don't care if it sounds like a STD as Nilbo points out...I want some, but.....
unlike you, I have big-headed stupid dogs, they'd eat it and die and I would get my just desserts for whining about the GD fence...
So I will admire yours but won't plant something poisonous to dogs --on purpose --in my yard, because of the aforementioned stupidity of my beloved pets.
Hi MB, I had Clematis for a few years til it died of its own accord (several plants all died in different places...I guess it didn't like my yard!) but no dogs ever ate it! dog pee killed one tho...
I also adore the fucktard word and am feeling special to know that Capt Underpants coined it.
anyway...I am fine but sorry to hear about the fence tragedy. Maybe you can get trumpet vine to grow (?) I have Never had luck with THAT! of course, Kudzo will always work but you may ....ahem....regret planting it amd the neighbors will HATE IT...SO GO WITH THAT! haha. have a great weekend! =)
What do you mean, I'm not so mucking fuch? I ALL that and a bag of low-fat Olestra-laden chips, baby girl!
(heeheeee)
Sweet Weetzie..new day and no more whining and puling...at least not for a few days or if I do whine, I will whine about something other than my fence! I love the trumpet vines too...also honeysuckle and wisteria which would pick up that fence twist it into a pretzel.
Lil Oprah...how do you do? I think I'll keep you as a pocket pet my pet!
My gold finches came back this morning for breakfast now that construction seems to be over...I say thistle all around! Cheers!
I've been too shy to comment but I love reading your blog. You have such a beautiful way with words.
Cover that fence with shrubbery! Shrub roses, climbing roses, anything beautiful and flowering that also grows tall so that you once again can be in your secret garden.
acumamakiki! A big welcome and hug for stopping by! Please don't be shy - I am always interested in your comments wherever I find them..honored to have them here at my place...
I am already researching all the possibilities of plantings which elevates my spirit.
Climbing roses would be wonderful..I wonder if there's enough sun back there..hmmm hope so!
When I read that they nailed to a living tree, and then, THEN left nails sticking out the other end...my jaw dropped. WTF are these people thinking? Oh yeah, they are NOT thinking.
I dont remember who said it...but about the tree growing ..I'm so laughing at that. Buh bye fence.
Got any super miracle grow?
lawbrat - It is with great glee ThatI shall fertilize the tree.
And as the tree shall grow
So the fence will go!
splat! and that's that
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