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Wednesday, July 19, 2006

Women + Food + Men = Assault in Connecticut

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Another Connecticut woman was assaulted in a kitchen of a neighboring town. The reason for this assault you ask?

Cold Canapes. (The horror of it all! No wonder why he slugged the bitch!)

Apparently she and another chef - male - were working in a kitchen together preparing food for a wedding. Someone complained the canapes were cold. The male chef went a bit crazy and started hitting the female chef in the head.

Once he cooled off to the temperature of the canapes...they both continued to cook for the event - fashioning roses out of radishes and weaving asparagus into little green rafts.

At some point after the wedding, the female chef decided cold canapes were not a good enough reason for facial bruising and went to the police to file a complaint.

When asked why she didn't report the crime right after it happened, she replied she didn't want to spoil the wedding.

Weddings before weltings must have been her mantra.

I do think a general warning should be sent out to all Connecticut women to be extra careful around men and vegetables until we can figure out what's going on here.

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Lieberman as Jackass

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I recently got some campaign literature in the mail from our distinguished senator Joe Lieberman. He should fire his PR people as the brochure depicts Lieberman as a mule. (Referring to his stubbornness.)

This brochure is so bad, many people I've spoken to think it's an attack ad put out by Ned Lamont.

Why else would you call your own self a mule when mules are
the sterile hybrid offspring of a male donkey and a female horse, characterized by long ears and a short mane.

Why would you call Joe a mule, which is street lingo for a drug smuggler?

Why a picture of a mule that looks way too close to a jackass which is a term Joe's been called now in CT for a while?

So Joe's campaign think tank is telling me Joe Lieberman's a sterile stubborn ass?

They don't think I know that already? (Well the stubborn ass part I know.)

We already have a huge stubborn ass in our president and his approval ratings are limbo low.

Was there any thought behind this unclever campaign ad?

This brochure is about as bad as anything I've ever seen. Fire those folks Joe.

Maybe he thought picturing Ned Lamont as a lizard would be a good move. I guess he doesn't understand that the Geico ghecko is an adored fellow in advertising land with as many votes as Brad Pitt for who women most want to spend an evening with eating Chinese food (in bed).

Had to put a link to my friend Metro here.



7 Comments:

Blogger Ilanna said...

Mary -

I think you need to start posting some links to some of this.

I would LOVE to see that add :) and i'm sure my mother would too as she agress with you about lieberman. :) (she's a politics junky, and lives only about half hour outside DC) :)

8:43 AM  
Blogger mary bishop said...

Ilanna - I did a quick Google search and there's commentary about the brochure but no pictures unfortunately.

http://www.connpost.com/news/ci_4068762

The above is a link to the chef bashing incident!

8:54 AM  
Blogger Ilanna said...

unless chicken is your target and/or you are the swedish chef (BORK BORK BORK!) there should be no banging around in the kitchen. At least not with any people as the target.

BTW, come back over - nice long political rang today :)

10:26 AM  
Blogger Michelle said...

The whole chef incident is weird as hell. If someone hit me, I'd not only ruin the wedding, I'd wake up anyone within 10 blocks who may have been sleeping. Screw the canapes.

5:10 PM  
Blogger mary bishop said...

Ilanna, I'm not cooking dinner tonight, just in case this food anger thing is contagious....(any excuse)

5:10 PM  
Blogger mary bishop said...

HI MIchelle...yup, that chef incident is a winner...two days in a row, two attacks on women over --or with --food.

5:44 PM  
Blogger mary bishop said...

El G - Martha would have slugged the buy back!

8:02 AM  

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